W.A.L.T write a narrative

success Criteria

I know I will be successful when….

• The title is suitable for the text.

• The orientation tells who the story is about, and when and where the story happened
• The complication describes a problem and explains what happened next.
• The resolution explains how the problem was solved.

This week in writing I have been writing about a space chimp. This is my draft of my story.

My space adventure

5 , 4 ,3 ,2 ,1 , BLAST OFF! It’s is 1961  Jack was  go in space and Jack  so nervous and boom Carlo said “What is that Jack?  “We here in the space  but we trap”, say Jack.  “I scare”, said Carlo.  He  was little and he  sleep and Jack was go in the  space and  Jack was looking the

Space. Carlo  touch a button in rocket he didn't know  what’s  it does.  Carlo thought the

Bottom was  toy and Jack was said no!!! Jack and Carlo was crying and  Carlo  said Jack!!!!

Carlo said “I want banana “.  He see the phone.  He call Jack on the phone and Jack  said are you OK?   Carlo said yes but i scare.  What are you scaring?  said Jack.  Carlo said but there are no banana and no air  and  so hot in the sun. Carlo was grow up and Carlo was don't know what's going  on said Carlo was don’t no what's happened  Carlo said  what’s happened in my brain said Carlo i remember is Jack .

65 years later…

Carlo was sleep in long years and he wake up and he see a light it’s milky way and he see the photo of Jack and me and i see the earth a landing in the earth and I want to see Jack in earth If I see in  earth said Carlo and Carlo was landing in the earth  Carlo was shaking in rocket and Carlo was thinking  Jack was in the earth and they happy but the matter  in Carlo was see earth and  he said Carlo what  happened this  earth said Carlo and this  earth . Jack came

Back said  Carlo WHY! WHY! WHY!  Happened here in the world  Carlo said  i remember  all said  I was a baby  have a button i pull said  and Carlo in space  but  

my heart is beating like a gam because  Jack was lost  in space sorry Jack  push the  button sorry sorry  Carlo said  i be crazy said  Carlo so so sorry Jack .photo said Carlo. But Jack  was.  WHY I GONNA DO THIS  I’ AM BE CRAZY  said Carlo. I Am Sorry Sorry Jack bye bye  Jack . And  Carlo  was  so a man  and he said are you broke this planet  said  Carlo  said the  man said  no I go this planet and I so

this broke  and I cry then I be  angry  this people said Carlo and the Man

And 5 years later…

And the man and Carlo was knock  in the door said the kid how are you are my clown said the kid no . I am Carlo and this my Friend OK said the kid but come our house  said the kid and said Carlo  was said are you so kind full kid said the kid thank you.

The kid  said this is my room said the kid and my mom was cooking in the kitchen and my birthday said the kid . Carlo said   I be clown said man me too  and  Carlo was be friendly and the finish the Birthday was Carlo can I sleep here said the kid yes .  Carlo was wake up  and he so sick and Carlo and . the kid wake up  and  the kid said are you OK kid said Carlo said  you so kind. Then  kid  said  I said to mom you have sick  mom said yes and Carlo was sleeping  and  kid said  wake up Carlo said thank you  kid said your welcome  and  I want to be your friend  Carlo said I want your friend  kid said I want your family your now my  family …. And happily ever after  

                                     The End